Tim has started working again on Amanda's owl urn. Before he was going to do the model in clay, but he needs an oven to work with it (different type, I guess) and so that wasn't going to work. Now he has plaster and will carve it out to make the model and later do it in wood. I had recently done some research as I didn't know what capacity the urn would need to be and found out that for every pound of body weight, it typically yields 1 cubic inch of cremains. Having to even process through that whole thing makes me nauseous. The process of what happened to my daughter's body after she died. Having to figure out what size urn you will need for your child....not something any parent should ever have to think about, EVER. What makes her situation a little different in trying to figure the calculation is that while she was on life support, she was being pumped full of stuff to try and make her less acidic and with her kidneys not functioning properly, the fluids had nowhere to go, so she became very bloated. I would think that that would burn off in the cremation process, but ??? And again, that is not something any parent should ever have to concern themselves with.
Another of our CSM "kids" got married yesterday. I'm very happy for them, for the family. Time marches on and Amanda won't get her happily ever after here. Sometimes I feel so cheated, so robbed. I hope and pray that Mike and Sara will one day get married at least and maybe (hopefully) make us grandparents someday, too. I would be over the moon.
One thing that Tim and I did in June, which I am so excited about and proud of is we ran our FIRST EVER 5K. Okay, so we didn't run the whole way, but I went into it with no expectations placed on myself other than to just finish. I walked when I needed to and just did what was best for me. Thankfully Tim didn't leave me in the dust; he stayed with me the whole time. Diane Dixon ran with us and we just made sure to keep her in eyesight. Sometimes we would pass her and then we'd walk and then she'd pass us. I was so jazzed when we crossed the finish line. We'd prepared and had bought protein shakes to chug afterwards to help our muscles rebound quicker with less adverse effects. Come to find out that I placed 3rd in my age bracket! What!?! I was exhausted, elated, and couldn't wait to do another one. I've just filled out the forms to participate in this program through the Choctaw that encourages healthy lifestyles. Through that, as long as you run 2 5K's in 12 months, they will pay your registration fees. Sweet deal. I'm looking forward to the next one...now to just get over this sickness!
